Well, after much thought and contemplating I have decided that nothing is changing. Nothing that should be changing is changing. The obvious stuff that is going to change regardless of if I want it too or not is changing but the rest stays the same. Things like Carrie going to potty by herself is a change, but one that would have been made in time anyway. Me and who I am is not changing. I am still the procrastinator, the sit and let life take mw where It wants to take me, laid back relaxed girl!
With this in mind.... I am having a hard time writing here. The more I read back, the more I see the plain fakeness out of this.... I am not going to change. I don't know how, and quite frankly, I am not sure if I want to!! I know, disappointment! But I not being fair to anyone dragging them along thinking I am going to do these great things when I already know I am not there right now!
Who knows, maybe I will get there at some point, but not yet. So, all I can say is hold on, and maybe I may jump back on the changing bandwagon!!
So, this is going to become the, if things change or are exciting blog!!
That is all for now.....goodnight!!!!!
When you are ready, I will be waiting ... *cue music*
ReplyDeleteOther than that, use it like I do ... a journal of sorts. When I FIRST started entries (on a site called Luna) it was ... WOW! 11 years ago ... and I wrote just to get words out. It didn't matter if anybody was actually listening. Sometimes writing things down makes you feel better, and THAT should be your goal. feeling better. Feeling better leads to good changes too. There are still times that I need it, and there are times when I use it not enough ... but even when I'm not writing here, I'm writing somewhere else. I have notebooks all over the place. Speaking of which, I have every intention of finding my own. The question is do I do it in Jan when the lease runs out, or try and stay another 6 months for a June move? Decisions ... How are things going with you otherwise?